how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
