It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
