You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
