We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
