This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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