This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
