I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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