I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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