I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize