I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
