I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
