We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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