Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
