I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
