Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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