there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize