yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
