She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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