the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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