I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
tell your sister to shave her snatch
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
