I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
