Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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