i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
