He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
