I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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