We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
