Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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