New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
