therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
