I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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