gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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