i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
