So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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