That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I am spending my child support on dildos
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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