i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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