I smell stomach acid.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
