Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Randomize
