Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
