why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
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