Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Just invented taco cereal.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
