she kept yelling 'call me bella'
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
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