It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
