i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
