I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
honey bunches of taint.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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