We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He felt like a one man threesome
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize