My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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