are you still at the devil's house?
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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