My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
