i just had sex bonerless
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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