But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
